UNDEFENDED HONESTY

It’s possible to build an even stronger relationship if sex addiction or porn addiction has impacted your relationship. But how? One skill, a capacity that can be developed is undefended honesty. This is a form of honesty that builds on the truth that’s been revealed in the disclosure of your sexually compulsive behavior.  This kind of honesty is not necessarily …

React or Respond? 

React or respond? These are two very different things, so what’s the difference between the two? A reaction is tied to an emotion. You feel something and then you react, which is what creates an immediate external reaction. This might be in the form of anger, lashing out, even freezing up and running away. First, something happens, like you smash …

Taking Ownership of Your Life

If you’re struggling with pornography addiction, it’s time to get the help and support you need. Our team at Neulia Compulsion Solutions can provide you with the resources and therapy you need to overcome your addiction and regain control of your life. Don’t let porn addiction keep you from living the life you deserve — learn more about how to …

Can I Stop the Pull of Porn?

Many men desperately want to stop the pull of porn. They want to know “Can I stop? If so, how?” Many of the guys who call mention that they’ve tried to stop, but haven’t been able to. So is there a secret? Can you actually get rid of this nagging temptation? At Compulsion Solutions, we believe men can take control …

Pause, Then Replace

PAUSE, THEN REPLACE You can’t just remove your sexual acting out behavior. Yes, you can stop the behavior for a while, but just stopping doesn’t lead to lasting change. That’s because you can’t just remove something and expect it to stay gone. You need to replace it. You need to replace, not just temporarily distract. You can’t just eliminate your …

Carry-On Only, Please!

Your acting out is a symptom — a symptom of a bigger issue. If you only focus on stopping behavior, you don’t get to the root of the problem, and it will continue. You might be able to control your porn addiction for a while — what has been called “white knuckling” — but what’s required is understanding what’s driving …

KNOWLEDGE + ACTION = RECOVERY

After you’ve gained some skills that help you become aware of the urge to act out, you can start to unravel the inner mechanism, which is your inner addict. But how exactly do you do that? There has to be a next step, and it’s not enough to just notice what’s happening. You need action to follow the awareness, a …

Is Porn an Intimacy Killer?

Watching porn gives you an unrealistic view of sex. Why is that? It’s unlikely that the person you’re in an actual relationship with is going to look like the person you see on the screen. What you see is manipulated — there’s lighting and photoshopping taking place, and so many other things that they can do to “edit” or “curate” …

PORN ADDICTION — THE COST DOESN’T EQUAL THE BENEFIT

When you’re a porn addict or a sex addict in the throes of feeling an urge to act out, you can lose sight of something very important — the cost. Your addiction might say to you, “Remember how good you feel when you act out? I can help you feel great. I can help you feel better.” These kinds of …

Sex and Porn Addiction Among Women

Sex or viewing porn can relieve stress and help you escape from reality. However, it’s only temporary relief…and it can take over your life if it becomes a repetitive cycle. If this cycle is something that’s becoming unconstructive or something you need to break free from, we can help. Women Develop Porn Addiction too There are many social biases and …

The TRUTH About Being Married To A Sex Addict

He swore on his children’s lives that he wasn’t having an affair. He said someone must have broken into his email account. He kept reassuring his wife that it was nothing. Finally, she got access to all of his phone records and his secret receipts. She also found a second cell phone he accidentally left on the passenger seat of …

PORN ADDICTION THERAPY SAVED MY MARRIAGE — AND MY LIFE!

Like many men, I thought my pornography sexual addiction was a dirty little secret known only to me. However, my wife started picking up on the “signs,” such as how I was not really “there” in our relationship, how I frequently had trouble “finishing” during sex, and how I had a general lack of interest in our marriage. In other …

I’m Addicted To Sex… But I’m The Only One Who Knows

I wake up every day with good intentions. I tell myself I won’t look at porn. I tell myself I can quit doing this; but by mid-day, I’ve already visited my favorite sites three times. I feel like I can’t stop myself, and that powerlessness is frightening. Does this mean I might be a sex addict? I’ve masturbated to porn …

George’s Story: I Stopped My Porn Addiction, And You Can Too

It took losing two wives before I finally admitted to myself that my use of porn was a serious problem. I finally realized I that porn and masturbation was running my life. That’s when I took the very big step (for me at the time) of calling a therapist to help me.   How did I end up in this …

5 Signs A Little Bit of Porn Has Become a Big Problem

All guys do it, right?  It doesn’t mean you have a problem. It’s not an addiction, is it? Why can’t I watch a little porn?   The problem for some men is that sex is an addictive substance, similar to alcohol and drugs.  Think of it in terms of social drinkers vs. alcoholics: one can drink, and get back to …

6 Things That Get Better After Quitting Porn

You don’t have to be a slave to porn. Below (from one of our amazing clients) are 6 things in your life that get better after you quit porn. You can do it too. Six months ago, my entire day revolved around porn. It was ruining my relationship. It was getting in the way of my goals and plans. It …

Can “Looking” be a Symptom of Sex Addiction?

Can “looking” or ogling be a symptom of your sex compulsion? Does looking trigger you into deep fantasy leading to compulsive sexual thoughts that won’t stop until you act out? Often times “ogling” is a step in the wrong direction for sex addicts, leading to other unhealthy sexual behavior. It hurts spouses too – the web is chock full of …

What Tiger Woods Can Show Us About Sex Addiction: It Begins in Childhood

Recently, Josh Feinstein wrote a column for CBS Sports opining that Tiger Woods’ father ruined his life. Even though I don’t regularly follow golf, this caught my attention, because I completely agree with Josh’s assessment of the situation. Tiger Woods is a publicly visible, but still tragic reminder that role modeling is how we learn to live our own lives. …

Withdrawal

Attempting to stop your compulsive sexual behavior requires a non-simple truth—the need to become comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. Once you have acknowledged you have a sex addiction, and made the decision to get help, you need to prepare yourself for a period of withdrawal. Like any drug or substance, it’s not going to be easy ride. Going through withdrawal from …